Dysfunction in a family

Well my blog is entitled my life so maybe I should make a post on my wonderful crazy life *laughs*

My dad had ptsd from WWII and he was always so nervous that he never wanted us kids around him. Plus my mother who had been abused and raped by her brothers didn't trust him with us. I've heard tales on how he "played around" with my mothers teenage neices..I don't know really..it's just tales...so my world was doomed before I was even born. They were married 10 years before my eldest sister was born..and then it seemed like bam bam bam..2 more followed every 2 1/2 years. I was always my eldest sisters "baby" from the day I was born. She babied me like a mother should of! My sister just older than me always resented me. Kathy (the eldest) didn't treat Kay (the second) very well. I remember being 7 or 8 years old and Kathy would have her friends over. Kay would try to go into the room they were in and Kathy would yell at her to get out. But then 10 minutes later she would call me back there to "show them how to do the jerk..the swim" one of those crazy dances they had in the 60's.

Mother always made Kay "babysit" me when she was busy. We would go fishing at the AP&L's camphouse about once a month in the spring summer and fall. I remember Kay would "pretend" to be "abducted" by someone and that "someone else would look like Kay but it wasn't her..she was somewhere else" Now I was like 5 then so it scared me. I do understand her resentment on having to keep me out of things..but...well..It wasn't MY fault mother was mentally challenged from her youth. (I do believe she was bipolar) As we got older and Kay started dating..if I wanted to go to...mother would make her take me..yes on her dates!! So she really hated me. Once I turned 12..I developed and man did I ever develope..My breast were a 36D by that time..so men..and I mean grown men..would notice me. So instead of guiding me through the "almost a woman" years..my sister started calling me names..whore slut..even though I was doing nothing wrong. Sure I enjoyed the attention. I'd never had the attention from a man I got then. I remember once, when I was 15..5 grown men held me down against a car so they could "pinch my titties" and see if they were "real"..My dear sister Kay..stood there with her arms folded in disgust saying :Karla you are such a whore..you are nothing but a whore"
Wow..how nice of her to help me!! When I tried a few years ago to let her know how she made me feel she said "well they pinched my titties too" (they didn't..she was just wishing) and "You don't understand..mother forced ME to be your mother" well duh Kay...I'd never call my daughter a whore if 5 men were holding her down to pinch her tits..I'd be beating the life out of them..telling them to get off her and leave her alone..not calling her a whore!!! Geeze no wonder your kids turned out the way they did!! (a snob, 2 crazy children who have admitted to having sex with each other and a gay son..wow)

My only saving grace in my younger days was Albert Pike and Kathy. Kathy got maried when I was 12 to an alcoholic..but he was good to me and he worked and made a living. The minute he got off work though he went for the beer!! (or the Wild Turkey..but usually beer..schlitz!! I wonder if he realized what he was drinking LOL) I practically lived with them for the next 4 years. More than once I'd be doing my homework when they would come in. When they left Gerald would always look at me and say "well..you coming or not?" I always went. he would take me to school the next morning and more days than not he would be there to pick me up :) I loved him dearly. I never had to take anything with me as I had clothes over there. (this is another sore spot with Kay..she says she had a drawer in the dresser in the second bedroom just like I did. I asked Kathy about this recently and she said..No..you are the only one that had a drawer..Kay didn't stay with us like you did. But Kay will argue with us about it...*shrugs)

Well this one is turning into a book. I'll try to type more tomorrow!!!!